It's official, I got my 48 hours notice.
No I didn't get fired... I decided to go back to the Philippines and I'm leaving Sunday.
The holding pattern I was stuck in since my last post finally broke (for which I am very grateful).
So now that I've rejoined the "Perpetual Traveler's Club" it's time to reactivate this blog to tell everyone where I am and what I'm doing.
Check back and I'll be in a new time zone.
Saturday, May 24, 2008
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Change of plans
Who am I kidding? Nothing is actually planned in my life... it's all just strung together haphazardly. For those of you who read the last post, please ignore it. If you haven't read it, then do so, then ignore it.
In fact everything will make sence if you change:
"I get to decide" to "I have no control over"
"'When' will be in a month or so" to "'When' will be as soon as possible"
"'How long' will be a week, two at the most" to "'How long' will be loooong"
Details to follow.
But the last post wasn't a complete failure... that picture is bangin' eh?
In fact everything will make sence if you change:
"I get to decide" to "I have no control over"
"'When' will be in a month or so" to "'When' will be as soon as possible"
"'How long' will be a week, two at the most" to "'How long' will be loooong"
Details to follow.
But the last post wasn't a complete failure... that picture is bangin' eh?
Thursday, April 10, 2008
Boring Blog
I'm pretty sure this is going to win the prize for the most boring blog while I am not out and about. Do they give a Webby for that?
Just before I left the Philippines I held a goodbye party for my self. (How cheeky, I know right?) But it was yet another company record I went out to set: the first ever successful pool party. A friend shot the best pic I've seen in quite some time.
I've basically told everyone that I have no plans to go back the the Philippines. So here is the truth: I'm going back. Mr (New) Manager came to me and informed me that the upper levels are having a bruhaha over this tool and want results! So off I go again. But this time I get to decide when and how long.
"When" will probably be in a month or so, and "How long" will be a week, two at the most. (If I had a penny for each time I said that I would be ... $0.12 richer.)
Just before I left the Philippines I held a goodbye party for my self. (How cheeky, I know right?) But it was yet another company record I went out to set: the first ever successful pool party. A friend shot the best pic I've seen in quite some time.
I've basically told everyone that I have no plans to go back the the Philippines. So here is the truth: I'm going back. Mr (New) Manager came to me and informed me that the upper levels are having a bruhaha over this tool and want results! So off I go again. But this time I get to decide when and how long.
"When" will probably be in a month or so, and "How long" will be a week, two at the most. (If I had a penny for each time I said that I would be ... $0.12 richer.)
Thursday, March 20, 2008
Goodbyes
Well it certainly is official: the only thing between me and the 12 hour drudgery of a plane flight is the CEO running down the tarmac yelling at the pilot to stop (as if 747s were made to stop on a dime). The amazing thing is that I wouldn't mind so much if our intrepid CEO did reenact every romantic comedy ever. I believe it is what the self-stylized experts call Stockholm Syndrome, except in my case the assailant is an entire country and the helpless victim is a clueless technician.
As of yet, I've avoided making serious comparisons between the two countries (key word here is "serious") because I may be a little worried about the inevitable conclusion. In order to avoid a dreary but insightful blog post (we can't have that now can we?) I'll delve into the less serious conclusions:
See you all on the flipside!
As of yet, I've avoided making serious comparisons between the two countries (key word here is "serious") because I may be a little worried about the inevitable conclusion. In order to avoid a dreary but insightful blog post (we can't have that now can we?) I'll delve into the less serious conclusions:
- Rabbits are wonderful pets; I plan to have a dozen upon my return. But if that old fart Fibonacci is to be believed, I'll get stuck between 8 and 13, which is undoubtedly an uncomfortable position to be in.
- Atheism is less accepted here than most French passports at the INS. In some lines of questioning the locals here will run out of possibilities for me after just two: Christian and Buddhist. I know I shouldn't enjoy these conversations but I can read them like a book, a book that says: "But he's too nice to go to to hell!". Maybe it's the masochist in me showing through.
- I thought they were joking about Christmas in December. I thought they were joking about 3 nannies watching a single child. I thought they were joking about whale sharks with more shark than whale in their blood. When they turned out to be right about all three, it's time I gave up my life as a cynic.
- Text messaging is a fantastic way to communicate. It's socially democratic, more efficient than a call, and text chat is slightly easier to decipher than most 128 bit encryptions. The only problem is when you have a company cell which has been in the hands of too many people you don't want to know anything about. Home loans and free car offers are one thing, but when it turns into clueless sisters wishing you a happy birthday 6 months out of season or jilted mistresses left in the rain on Valentines Day it's high time you go shopping for a hacked SIM card.
- SIM card shopping, by the way, is a hackers paradise. I've never seen an iPhone cracked before last month. At which point I saw 4 iPhones cracked simultaneously off one computer while the stall nearby was peddling hacking services on every phone except those on a very short list. When it becomes easier to list the code you haven't broken it's time to give up eliminating piracy and start taxing it! The hack fest as I like to call it, was bigger and better than an engineering job fair circa 1999, booth babes and all.
See you all on the flipside!
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Souvenirs!
I don't want to jinx anything by talking about my voyage home too much. But as this is last weekend I'll have to go shopping. So what do you want from the Philippines?
So far I've purchased enough pearls to rebuild an entire oyster and enough rum to make you want to eat said oyster. Among other things that are delightfully cheap here are "barongs" (traditional Filipino shirts) and sarongs and basically everything hand made.
What do you want? What have you always wanted from the south pacific but could never quite justify the 15 hour plane flight?
Speaking of which, if you are in the south pacific one of these days, call me up! I can send you to every hidden paradise in these islands. I've traveled more than most of our engineers combined and have seen enough for to fill a dozen vacations.
So far I've purchased enough pearls to rebuild an entire oyster and enough rum to make you want to eat said oyster. Among other things that are delightfully cheap here are "barongs" (traditional Filipino shirts) and sarongs and basically everything hand made.
What do you want? What have you always wanted from the south pacific but could never quite justify the 15 hour plane flight?
Speaking of which, if you are in the south pacific one of these days, call me up! I can send you to every hidden paradise in these islands. I've traveled more than most of our engineers combined and have seen enough for to fill a dozen vacations.
Sunday, March 9, 2008
How do I manage to be homesick for two homes?
Happy Daylight savings! Today I get an hour older as I will not be celebrating the clock change.
This weekend I have nothing to report: just a lazy weekend hanging around and recovering. But the weekend prior I hit up my local haunt for diving down in Sabong. I've been there three (two?) times before and have reported on it. Even still it never fails to surprise.
Hugo (the resident turtle) made an appearance on our night dive. Everyone instantly forgot the planned dive profile and went off chasing him into the deep. As he passed within 3 meters of me I got an amazing impression of his size; he is easily 1.5 m long and his wingspan clearly dwarfs my own. Last time we caught him sleeping on the bottom so this was a real treat.
The second surprise was waiting in our hotel room gift basket: free viagra. That should give you a decent impression of the local recreation and age demographic.
On the other hand, many things weren't all that surprising: decent weather, calm seas, good food, good company, and ridiculously cheap gin and juice.
Last week, 3 managers conspired to delay my flight home. This week it was two VPs. Next time it'll be one CEO or a partridge in a pear tree; it's a toss-up. But seriously, this time I will put my foot down... lightly. I will be flying out March 20th just in time for a wedding I haven't RSVPed to and a long-delayed game of disk golf.
Last time I flew back to the states I made a list of all the things I had missed. I fear this time the list will be longer and will only contain things that I will miss from the Philippines. Starting with this:
This weekend I have nothing to report: just a lazy weekend hanging around and recovering. But the weekend prior I hit up my local haunt for diving down in Sabong. I've been there three (two?) times before and have reported on it. Even still it never fails to surprise.
Hugo (the resident turtle) made an appearance on our night dive. Everyone instantly forgot the planned dive profile and went off chasing him into the deep. As he passed within 3 meters of me I got an amazing impression of his size; he is easily 1.5 m long and his wingspan clearly dwarfs my own. Last time we caught him sleeping on the bottom so this was a real treat.
The second surprise was waiting in our hotel room gift basket: free viagra. That should give you a decent impression of the local recreation and age demographic.
On the other hand, many things weren't all that surprising: decent weather, calm seas, good food, good company, and ridiculously cheap gin and juice.
Last week, 3 managers conspired to delay my flight home. This week it was two VPs. Next time it'll be one CEO or a partridge in a pear tree; it's a toss-up. But seriously, this time I will put my foot down... lightly. I will be flying out March 20th just in time for a wedding I haven't RSVPed to and a long-delayed game of disk golf.
Last time I flew back to the states I made a list of all the things I had missed. I fear this time the list will be longer and will only contain things that I will miss from the Philippines. Starting with this:
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Work work work
Just a work related update:
I'm exhausted, frustrated and none too cheery so I'll keep it short to spare you the pain. I was supposed to be on a flight leaving Manila right now. I should be taxiing across the runway right now. I should be settling into my standard flight routine. But clearly I am not.
Three managers over-ruled my flight so now I'm grounded (quite literally) in paradise.
Sigh...
I'm exhausted, frustrated and none too cheery so I'll keep it short to spare you the pain. I was supposed to be on a flight leaving Manila right now. I should be taxiing across the runway right now. I should be settling into my standard flight routine. But clearly I am not.
Three managers over-ruled my flight so now I'm grounded (quite literally) in paradise.
Sigh...
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Whale Sharks
I'm back and no I wasn't mistaken for plankton and eaten! (A damn shame, I know)
Friday afternoon the four of us (a co-worker, two German friends, and I) took off for the long voyage south. Even though we stuck to the Great Southern Highway, it took us 10 hours to go 300 km. Common hazards included trikes, pedi-cabs, pedestrians, dogs, chickens, pigs and potholes the size of small US states. For those unfamiliar, a pedi-cab is a bicycle with attached side car, traveling down the highway at 10 kph with no tail or head lights at night and driven by someone dressed all in black. Also, our windshield was tinted dark. Suffice to say, it was an adventure just getting there alive.
We arrived at the first stop: a wakeboard cable park. $4 for equipment rental, lesson, and one hour on the water: you can't say no to that. I decided to stick to kneeboarding because I didn't want to know what it feels like to go from 0 to 30 kph and back again in the span of half a second. I also did not want to know what my arms would feel like the next day. The down side is that kneeboarding doesn't nearly look as cool as wakeboarding so all the pictures of me have been conveniently "lost".
Next came a 4 hour drive to the whale shark capitol of the world. Amazingly enough, 15 years ago no one knew that whale sharks lived in the Philippines except for the villagers who occasionally hunted them (named Buntanding in the local dialect). Even more amazing, the locals agreed to stop hunting them as long as the tourists supplied income. From fishermen to tourist guides in less than a generation!
To see the whale sharks all you have to do is get on a boat, float a 100 yards or so from shore and wait for a giant shadow to cruise past. Then hurriedly throw on your snorkeling equipment, dive into the water, swim a wind sprint to the shadow, then kick like mad just to keep up with the beast. The last is the most difficult, not because it is tiring or even possible, but because the first sight of the shark completely shuts down your mind: snorkelers literally stop mid-stroke to gape as the shark sails past. Then they pull their head out and sputter something about "fish", "large", and "fast" interspersed with gleeful gibberish. And so the day ended, no one eaten or even slightly gummed (as I imagine whale sharks and senile great whites would behave), and everyone reminiscing with great flourish about the race to the dorsal fin but never quite getting there. Needless to say, I will be going back and this time the weather will be better, the water clearer, and the stories fishy-er.
From the whale sharks we headed East to go island hopping. We actually never made it to the isles because our short cut became the long cut which then became the impassible goat trail of doom. (Later it became worse.) At one point we got stuck in a stream, mud, pebbles, and grass: one tire in each and at the same time (we are an equal opportunity road destruction team). Now we were stuck in the sticks with the immediate population density comparable to Jupiter. A passing motorcyclist (the second such sighting of the day) offered to get a few people to help. So a village turned up to help us out; and it took a village. I bit back the urge to yell:
What can I say, the mood was right. Instead I cheered when the car broke free and learned what an offroad car with no mud flaps can do to the idiot behind. I was "peppered pretty good". Eventually we had to turn around when the third motorcyclist of the day caught up and warned us what we were getting into.
One last stop at the most luxurious spas in the world: deep in virgin jungle, natural hot springs, and magic in the air.
Friday afternoon the four of us (a co-worker, two German friends, and I) took off for the long voyage south. Even though we stuck to the Great Southern Highway, it took us 10 hours to go 300 km. Common hazards included trikes, pedi-cabs, pedestrians, dogs, chickens, pigs and potholes the size of small US states. For those unfamiliar, a pedi-cab is a bicycle with attached side car, traveling down the highway at 10 kph with no tail or head lights at night and driven by someone dressed all in black. Also, our windshield was tinted dark. Suffice to say, it was an adventure just getting there alive.
We arrived at the first stop: a wakeboard cable park. $4 for equipment rental, lesson, and one hour on the water: you can't say no to that. I decided to stick to kneeboarding because I didn't want to know what it feels like to go from 0 to 30 kph and back again in the span of half a second. I also did not want to know what my arms would feel like the next day. The down side is that kneeboarding doesn't nearly look as cool as wakeboarding so all the pictures of me have been conveniently "lost".
Next came a 4 hour drive to the whale shark capitol of the world. Amazingly enough, 15 years ago no one knew that whale sharks lived in the Philippines except for the villagers who occasionally hunted them (named Buntanding in the local dialect). Even more amazing, the locals agreed to stop hunting them as long as the tourists supplied income. From fishermen to tourist guides in less than a generation!
To see the whale sharks all you have to do is get on a boat, float a 100 yards or so from shore and wait for a giant shadow to cruise past. Then hurriedly throw on your snorkeling equipment, dive into the water, swim a wind sprint to the shadow, then kick like mad just to keep up with the beast. The last is the most difficult, not because it is tiring or even possible, but because the first sight of the shark completely shuts down your mind: snorkelers literally stop mid-stroke to gape as the shark sails past. Then they pull their head out and sputter something about "fish", "large", and "fast" interspersed with gleeful gibberish. And so the day ended, no one eaten or even slightly gummed (as I imagine whale sharks and senile great whites would behave), and everyone reminiscing with great flourish about the race to the dorsal fin but never quite getting there. Needless to say, I will be going back and this time the weather will be better, the water clearer, and the stories fishy-er.
From the whale sharks we headed East to go island hopping. We actually never made it to the isles because our short cut became the long cut which then became the impassible goat trail of doom. (Later it became worse.) At one point we got stuck in a stream, mud, pebbles, and grass: one tire in each and at the same time (we are an equal opportunity road destruction team). Now we were stuck in the sticks with the immediate population density comparable to Jupiter. A passing motorcyclist (the second such sighting of the day) offered to get a few people to help. So a village turned up to help us out; and it took a village. I bit back the urge to yell:
Push! You scurvy infested bastards, put your back into it! Heave! My grandmother can lift this car , you rum-swilling bettle nut-chewing ingrates!
What can I say, the mood was right. Instead I cheered when the car broke free and learned what an offroad car with no mud flaps can do to the idiot behind. I was "peppered pretty good". Eventually we had to turn around when the third motorcyclist of the day caught up and warned us what we were getting into.
One last stop at the most luxurious spas in the world: deep in virgin jungle, natural hot springs, and magic in the air.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
1st, 2nd, and Last vacation
Today marks the 6 month anniversary of my stay in the Philippines. I hear from the old gray beards that if I stay just one more month I will hold the company record for the longest stint. I'm glad to say that the record will hold and I'll happily take second place.
I extended my stay here until the 27th so that I can go on one last vacation. But before I get into that, I have an update on the vacation last weekend. (Life is tough here.)
A co-worker and I headed to Bohol for a 3 day weekend. (President's Day counts even in the wrong country right?)
The first day we wandered around the island a bit. Remember my trip to Thailand and the midnight ride on the back of a scooter? Well, it turns out it is way more fun (read: dangerous) in the Philippines where there are renting one costs $5 and there are no laws, driver licenses, or helmets. We turned a few heads as the area is mostly undiscovered but that may have been because of the one way street signs we missed.
The second day was entirely devoted to scuba diving. Balicasag Island was the drop point. I'm told by a trusted source the reef there is better than the Great Barrier Reef. Dive one was devoted to zoology: turtles, mackrel, groupers, and barracuda. For the most part barracuda don't bother me, even with their tendency to follow divers. But an entire school some 100-150 individuals strong (small by Balicasag standards) is a different matter. The school formed a wall 20 feet tall, 30 feet long and about 10 feet away. Because we were between the school and the rock wall, I couldn't back up to see the entire school at once. One albino barracuda kept our attention while the rest of the school closed in from above. With heart rate and air consumption skyrocketing, I gave a signal to move on. The second dive was more peaceful as we toured the coral garden which I can say is unmatched in all my experience.
The last day of the trip we went exploring deeper into the island, this time with a car (we got tired of the rain, wind, and onlookers that a scooter ride typically includes). We visited a blacksmith hand-making kitchen knives from rusty Jeepney springs and a newly replaced and upgraded bamboo bridge (now with 1% more steel support!)
From there we ventured into the interior to see the Chocolate Hills and the Tarsiers. The chocolate hills were amazing yet the pictures can't quite describe them.
Just imagine that with a full 360 degree panorama, hundreds in number, dappled sunlight, and alien in their near-perfect shapes. The Tarsiers of the region are the worlds smallest monkey are are nigh impossible to find. Thankfully they are nocturnal so they don't move about too much, allowing from decent photography. All this one is missing is a light saber.
Next weekend is devoted to whale shark chasing! Wish me luck!
I extended my stay here until the 27th so that I can go on one last vacation. But before I get into that, I have an update on the vacation last weekend. (Life is tough here.)
A co-worker and I headed to Bohol for a 3 day weekend. (President's Day counts even in the wrong country right?)
The first day we wandered around the island a bit. Remember my trip to Thailand and the midnight ride on the back of a scooter? Well, it turns out it is way more fun (read: dangerous) in the Philippines where there are renting one costs $5 and there are no laws, driver licenses, or helmets. We turned a few heads as the area is mostly undiscovered but that may have been because of the one way street signs we missed.
The second day was entirely devoted to scuba diving. Balicasag Island was the drop point. I'm told by a trusted source the reef there is better than the Great Barrier Reef. Dive one was devoted to zoology: turtles, mackrel, groupers, and barracuda. For the most part barracuda don't bother me, even with their tendency to follow divers. But an entire school some 100-150 individuals strong (small by Balicasag standards) is a different matter. The school formed a wall 20 feet tall, 30 feet long and about 10 feet away. Because we were between the school and the rock wall, I couldn't back up to see the entire school at once. One albino barracuda kept our attention while the rest of the school closed in from above. With heart rate and air consumption skyrocketing, I gave a signal to move on. The second dive was more peaceful as we toured the coral garden which I can say is unmatched in all my experience.
The last day of the trip we went exploring deeper into the island, this time with a car (we got tired of the rain, wind, and onlookers that a scooter ride typically includes). We visited a blacksmith hand-making kitchen knives from rusty Jeepney springs and a newly replaced and upgraded bamboo bridge (now with 1% more steel support!)
From there we ventured into the interior to see the Chocolate Hills and the Tarsiers. The chocolate hills were amazing yet the pictures can't quite describe them.
Just imagine that with a full 360 degree panorama, hundreds in number, dappled sunlight, and alien in their near-perfect shapes. The Tarsiers of the region are the worlds smallest monkey are are nigh impossible to find. Thankfully they are nocturnal so they don't move about too much, allowing from decent photography. All this one is missing is a light saber.
Next weekend is devoted to whale shark chasing! Wish me luck!
Friday, February 15, 2008
First real vacation
Wow! It's been a month since the last update... sorry about that folks. Too much work and not enough play. To remedy the situation I'm flying to Bohol this morning for some dives, hikes, etc.
In the mean time, I'm proud to present "Confusing Conversations with a Salesman Part II"
Saleswoman: Sir, Fresh Pearls!
Me: (just looking)
Saleswoman: Highest quality. For you, first buyer, 1000 Pesos.
Me: How many first buyers have you had today?It's almost three.
Saleswoman: You're the first! For your wife? (gestures to my co-worker)
Me: Her? (Looking at co-worker) If I bought pearls for her, my wife would be very upset.
In the mean time, I'm proud to present "Confusing Conversations with a Salesman Part II"
Saleswoman: Sir, Fresh Pearls!
Me: (just looking)
Saleswoman: Highest quality. For you, first buyer, 1000 Pesos.
Me: How many first buyers have you had today?It's almost three.
Saleswoman: You're the first! For your wife? (gestures to my co-worker)
Me: Her? (Looking at co-worker) If I bought pearls for her, my wife would be very upset.
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