Bad Blogger!

Well it's a good thing I never tried to capitalize on all those crazy dreams about making my living writing because if this blog proves anything, that was certainly a pipe dream.

Sorry about the cliff hanger that lasted upwards of an entire year. I feel like than George R. R. Martin leaving readers hanging for 4 years now! Also I have no idea what I was supposed to write about in the follow-up post so I'm not going to bother reprising the post and instead pretend it never happened.

For those of you who were worried about my predicament in the Philippines during Typhoon Ondoy (landed Sept 25th): I'm fine!

In fact, I was 6000 miles away in Oregon so I cheated a bit. I was on a quick business trip in that neck of the woods. I just got back this week to the Philippines and found little lasting evidence of the flood and typhoon but I'm jumping ahead of myself.

From what I hear, Typhoon Ondoy started as a rainy typhoon (as opposed to a windy one or a rainy-windy one) and the flooding was not more than usual.  Soon it became apparent (in the worst hit regions) that the flood waters were not going to recede as it continued to rain. In the 24 peak hours some places received 455mm of rain. For comparison San Francisco gets 480mm of rain in a year. Regardless of the flood precautions taken by city planners, you can't move half a meter of rain water fast enough to prevent flooding. And, as you can imagine, most of the cities here were not planned; they just happened.

Ondoy made landfall just opposite Luzon (the main island) of Manila and immediately made a bee-line for the city. For those who don't know: Metro Manila is huge. It's about half the area of Greater LA but with twice the population (20 Million) most of which lives in shanty towns. When it hit these areas the impact was harsh. My written explanation can't be sufficient but these pictures can do it justice.

One thing I have to add is that where I live was never in any real danger. I imagine it was similar to the fires in LA hills the past couple summers. If you were to ask a friend in the area about them the conversation would go something along the lines of:

"Yes, the horizon is glowing orange. And yes, it is raining ash"

"Are you going to evacuate?"

"Why? It's on the other side of LA"

Same thing here.

Thats about all I have on the typhoon except to share this little gem of the current typhoon. 

My favorite part of that picture is not the chaotic path the typhoon left behind, but the gall of the forecaster to guess where it will be tomorrow. Imagine the number of incorrect predictions that were made each time with the declaration: "This time we're certain!"

On a side note about shanty towns: Stewart Brand has a good (but fast) TED talk about them that puts them in a completely new light.

Multiple Post update, part the second

Merry Ramadan everyone! (Today is a national holiday here in observance of the last day of Ramadan.)
A few months ago I set Yoshi up with a trip to the Philippines using my frequent flyer miles.
So basically the week after the dive trip, Yoshi landed in Manila and I took a few days off to show him around the islands. Of course most of was a spurned on by a self-centered and pressing need to escape Manila and go relax on a beach somewhere.
The first weekend he was here we flew out to Boracay. During my last trip to Boracay I got nearly drunk with two of my future bosses and set a co-workers leg on fire. Needless to say, the trip with Yoshi was planned to be slightly less career threatening.
Unfortuately, I forgot about the whole "rainy season" thing. In my defense, I've since asked a few locals and have never recieved the same answer twice. There are only 12 months in the year which makes for only 133 distinct sequential month combinations but I don't yet know 134 filipinos well enough to ask a stupid question to satisly my mathematical curiosity. (That's a lie... I go to rediculous extents to prove a mathematical point... for instance, counting all the distinct sequential month combinations)
Back to the story: Yoshi and I flew to Boracay in the midst of a tropical depression. Officailly that doesn't violate my rule concerning travelling during a Typhoon. So the first day on the beach was spent walking the length of the island in a torrential downpour. Now, you probably do not know how much fun that is because you've never been in a torrential downpour. Imagine millions of warm marble-sized water drops stricking you with such force you can't imagine it lasting more than 5 minutes. Then imagine the same thing that continues for more than an hour. This country never ceases to amaze.
The next day was overcast and a bit drizzly. Regardless, we grabbed a boat and went out for a snorkling trip around to Crocadile Island. No jellyfish this time around but we got hit by a rippin' current.
Our last day we rented motorbikes and toured the interior of the island. We visited the bat cave where we were not greeted by Bruce Wayne or a Batmobile (not even the one with the foam tail fins that would fall off on every sharp turn). At the bottom of the cave we were greated by deafening screeches, disgusting auromas and one nice image.
The pool is actually the ocean that works it way up into the cave forming that nice picturesque pool.

After escaping the cave we climbed to the highest point of the island where I took a 360 panoramic. And now Blogger wont let me upload it, I'll try again later.
Shortly thereafter we were winging our way back to Manila for the next big adventure. (I have all my cliff hangers written by Franklin W. Dixon.)

Kind readers

Wow... the dashboard on the right says that I missed posting in July, August, and most of September. I didn't go on hiatus or even die... I just stopped posting for no particular reason. So to my dedicated (and now possibly non-existent) readers, I'm sorry.
I've so much to cover I'll have to make this a multiple post. But that may mean I'll finish it some time around Christmas. Fortunately for me, Christmas has already started. Yes I'm still in the Philippines and am now entering my second year here.
On the anniversary (plus or minus a month) I went out for a few dives at my local dive haunt. Thomas and I did the infamous "The Canyons" dive which was a wicked strong drift dive. Basically the current that runs the length of western-Luzon coast runs pretty shallow right next to Puerta Galero. So we dive it to see the big ocean fish passing through. But we can only dive it when the ebb tide couteracts the prevailing current. At a mere 20% power, my mask was in iminent danger of being ripped off my face each time I grabbed a rock and looked upstream. Needless to say, I rarely repeated that maneauver. We were going at a pretty good clip and by the time the 45 minute dive was over, we were in the deep blue and very alone.
Later we hiked the length of White Beach to visit the famous "Lucas" reastaurant on the last spit of land on Mindoro. That the restaurant on the far right, Thomas in the foreground, Pauline in the center, and White Beach visible on the left.

Obviously I fell in love with the panoramic feature on my camera. You're going to see a lot more of those in the next few posts. The size seems small but on my origianls you can zoom way in and see the people. I want to take these and see how big I can get them printed and framed. Some should be half a wall sized.
The only other decent picture from that trip, I took at 5am on the way back to work on Monday morning.
That's it for now but I promise to get more posted in a bit!

Quick update from France

So, I'm in France... not sure if everyone knew. My cousin got married and it was quite the wedding. I don't have any pictures from that as of yet but I did wander around my second home-away-from-home: Paris. By "wander" I actually mean that I hiked from end to end seeing as much as I could before collapsing from exhaustion.
First Jardin Luxemburg...

then Notre Dame...

then la Partheon...

then la Louvre...

then l'Arc de Triomphe...

then la Tour Effiel...

then back to the hotel. All in all it was a 10 mile walk around the best city in the world.
Fun times!

Packing

I'm often asked how I pack for a 6 months stint in the Philippines. That's an outright lie, no one ever asks me that, but I do have a method to my madness that may be worth sharing.

Step 1. Take 3 tours through the apartment and throw everything you may need in a big pile. (See below)
Step 2. Place above items in two large bags along with your scuba diving gear, passport, and tickets. (See below)
Step 3. (The one I have the most trouble with) Show up on the right day for your flight.

Back!

It's official, I got my 48 hours notice.
No I didn't get fired... I decided to go back to the Philippines and I'm leaving Sunday.
The holding pattern I was stuck in since my last post finally broke (for which I am very grateful).

So now that I've rejoined the "Perpetual Traveler's Club" it's time to reactivate this blog to tell everyone where I am and what I'm doing.

Check back and I'll be in a new time zone.

Change of plans

Who am I kidding? Nothing is actually planned in my life... it's all just strung together haphazardly. For those of you who read the last post, please ignore it. If you haven't read it, then do so, then ignore it.
In fact everything will make sence if you change:
"I get to decide" to "I have no control over"
"'When' will be in a month or so" to "'When' will be as soon as possible"
"'How long' will be a week, two at the most" to "'How long' will be loooong"

Details to follow.

But the last post wasn't a complete failure... that picture is bangin' eh?

Boring Blog

I'm pretty sure this is going to win the prize for the most boring blog while I am not out and about. Do they give a Webby for that?

Just before I left the Philippines I held a goodbye party for my self. (How cheeky, I know right?) But it was yet another company record I went out to set: the first ever successful pool party. A friend shot the best pic I've seen in quite some time.


I've basically told everyone that I have no plans to go back the the Philippines. So here is the truth: I'm going back. Mr (New) Manager came to me and informed me that the upper levels are having a bruhaha over this tool and want results! So off I go again. But this time I get to decide when and how long.
"When" will probably be in a month or so, and "How long" will be a week, two at the most. (If I had a penny for each time I said that I would be ... $0.12 richer.)

Goodbyes

Well it certainly is official: the only thing between me and the 12 hour drudgery of a plane flight is the CEO running down the tarmac yelling at the pilot to stop (as if 747s were made to stop on a dime). The amazing thing is that I wouldn't mind so much if our intrepid CEO did reenact every romantic comedy ever. I believe it is what the self-stylized experts call Stockholm Syndrome, except in my case the assailant is an entire country and the helpless victim is a clueless technician.
As of yet, I've avoided making serious comparisons between the two countries (key word here is "serious") because I may be a little worried about the inevitable conclusion. In order to avoid a dreary but insightful blog post (we can't have that now can we?) I'll delve into the less serious conclusions:

• Rabbits are wonderful pets; I plan to have a dozen upon my return. But if that old fart Fibonacci is to be believed, I'll get stuck between 8 and 13, which is undoubtedly an uncomfortable position to be in.
• Atheism is less accepted here than most French passports at the INS. In some lines of questioning the locals here will run out of possibilities for me after just two: Christian and Buddhist. I know I shouldn't enjoy these conversations but I can read them like a book, a book that says: "But he's too nice to go to to hell!". Maybe it's the masochist in me showing through.
• I thought they were joking about Christmas in December. I thought they were joking about 3 nannies watching a single child. I thought they were joking about whale sharks with more shark than whale in their blood. When they turned out to be right about all three, it's time I gave up my life as a cynic.
• Text messaging is a fantastic way to communicate. It's socially democratic, more efficient than a call, and text chat is slightly easier to decipher than most 128 bit encryptions. The only problem is when you have a company cell which has been in the hands of too many people you don't want to know anything about. Home loans and free car offers are one thing, but when it turns into clueless sisters wishing you a happy birthday 6 months out of season or jilted mistresses left in the rain on Valentines Day it's high time you go shopping for a hacked SIM card.
• SIM card shopping, by the way, is a hackers paradise. I've never seen an iPhone cracked before last month. At which point I saw 4 iPhones cracked simultaneously off one computer while the stall nearby was peddling hacking services on every phone except those on a very short list. When it becomes easier to list the code you haven't broken it's time to give up eliminating piracy and start taxing it! The hack fest as I like to call it, was bigger and better than an engineering job fair circa 1999, booth babes and all.

That was a rather truncated list but it managed to avoid the true meaning of this post long enough for my total word count to exceed its limit.
See you all on the flipside!

Souvenirs!

I don't want to jinx anything by talking about my voyage home too much. But as this is last weekend I'll have to go shopping. So what do you want from the Philippines?
So far I've purchased enough pearls to rebuild an entire oyster and enough rum to make you want to eat said oyster. Among other things that are delightfully cheap here are "barongs" (traditional Filipino shirts) and sarongs and basically everything hand made.
What do you want? What have you always wanted from the south pacific but could never quite justify the 15 hour plane flight?

Speaking of which, if you are in the south pacific one of these days, call me up! I can send you to every hidden paradise in these islands. I've traveled more than most of our engineers combined and have seen enough for to fill a dozen vacations.

How do I manage to be homesick for two homes?

Happy Daylight savings! Today I get an hour older as I will not be celebrating the clock change.
This weekend I have nothing to report: just a lazy weekend hanging around and recovering. But the weekend prior I hit up my local haunt for diving down in Sabong. I've been there three (two?) times before and have reported on it. Even still it never fails to surprise.
Hugo (the resident turtle) made an appearance on our night dive. Everyone instantly forgot the planned dive profile and went off chasing him into the deep. As he passed within 3 meters of me I got an amazing impression of his size; he is easily 1.5 m long and his wingspan clearly dwarfs my own. Last time we caught him sleeping on the bottom so this was a real treat.
The second surprise was waiting in our hotel room gift basket: free viagra. That should give you a decent impression of the local recreation and age demographic.
On the other hand, many things weren't all that surprising: decent weather, calm seas, good food, good company, and ridiculously cheap gin and juice.

Last week, 3 managers conspired to delay my flight home. This week it was two VPs. Next time it'll be one CEO or a partridge in a pear tree; it's a toss-up. But seriously, this time I will put my foot down... lightly. I will be flying out March 20th just in time for a wedding I haven't RSVPed to and a long-delayed game of disk golf.

Last time I flew back to the states I made a list of all the things I had missed. I fear this time the list will be longer and will only contain things that I will miss from the Philippines. Starting with this:

Work work work

Just a work related update:
I'm exhausted, frustrated and none too cheery so I'll keep it short to spare you the pain. I was supposed to be on a flight leaving Manila right now. I should be taxiing across the runway right now. I should be settling into my standard flight routine. But clearly I am not.
Three managers over-ruled my flight so now I'm grounded (quite literally) in paradise.

Sigh...

Whale Sharks

I'm back and no I wasn't mistaken for plankton and eaten! (A damn shame, I know)
Friday afternoon the four of us (a co-worker, two German friends, and I) took off for the long voyage south. Even though we stuck to the Great Southern Highway, it took us 10 hours to go 300 km. Common hazards included trikes, pedi-cabs, pedestrians, dogs, chickens, pigs and potholes the size of small US states. For those unfamiliar, a pedi-cab is a bicycle with attached side car, traveling down the highway at 10 kph with no tail or head lights at night and driven by someone dressed all in black. Also, our windshield was tinted dark. Suffice to say, it was an adventure just getting there alive.


We arrived at the first stop: a wakeboard cable park. $4 for equipment rental, lesson, and one hour on the water: you can't say no to that. I decided to stick to kneeboarding because I didn't want to know what it feels like to go from 0 to 30 kph and back again in the span of half a second. I also did not want to know what my arms would feel like the next day. The down side is that kneeboarding doesn't nearly look as cool as wakeboarding so all the pictures of me have been conveniently "lost".
Next came a 4 hour drive to the whale shark capitol of the world. Amazingly enough, 15 years ago no one knew that whale sharks lived in the Philippines except for the villagers who occasionally hunted them (named Buntanding in the local dialect). Even more amazing, the locals agreed to stop hunting them as long as the tourists supplied income. From fishermen to tourist guides in less than a generation!
To see the whale sharks all you have to do is get on a boat, float a 100 yards or so from shore and wait for a giant shadow to cruise past. Then hurriedly throw on your snorkeling equipment, dive into the water, swim a wind sprint to the shadow, then kick like mad just to keep up with the beast. The last is the most difficult, not because it is tiring or even possible, but because the first sight of the shark completely shuts down your mind: snorkelers literally stop mid-stroke to gape as the shark sails past. Then they pull their head out and sputter something about "fish", "large", and "fast" interspersed with gleeful gibberish. And so the day ended, no one eaten or even slightly gummed (as I imagine whale sharks and senile great whites would behave), and everyone reminiscing with great flourish about the race to the dorsal fin but never quite getting there. Needless to say, I will be going back and this time the weather will be better, the water clearer, and the stories fishy-er.


From the whale sharks we headed East to go island hopping. We actually never made it to the isles because our short cut became the long cut which then became the impassible goat trail of doom. (Later it became worse.) At one point we got stuck in a stream, mud, pebbles, and grass: one tire in each and at the same time (we are an equal opportunity road destruction team). Now we were stuck in the sticks with the immediate population density comparable to Jupiter. A passing motorcyclist (the second such sighting of the day) offered to get a few people to help. So a village turned up to help us out; and it took a village. I bit back the urge to yell:

Push! You scurvy infested bastards, put your back into it! Heave! My grandmother can lift this car , you rum-swilling bettle nut-chewing ingrates!

What can I say, the mood was right. Instead I cheered when the car broke free and learned what an offroad car with no mud flaps can do to the idiot behind. I was "peppered pretty good". Eventually we had to turn around when the third motorcyclist of the day caught up and warned us what we were getting into.
One last stop at the most luxurious spas in the world: deep in virgin jungle, natural hot springs, and magic in the air.

1st, 2nd, and Last vacation

Today marks the 6 month anniversary of my stay in the Philippines. I hear from the old gray beards that if I stay just one more month I will hold the company record for the longest stint. I'm glad to say that the record will hold and I'll happily take second place.
I extended my stay here until the 27th so that I can go on one last vacation. But before I get into that, I have an update on the vacation last weekend. (Life is tough here.)
A co-worker and I headed to Bohol for a 3 day weekend. (President's Day counts even in the wrong country right?)
The first day we wandered around the island a bit. Remember my trip to Thailand and the midnight ride on the back of a scooter? Well, it turns out it is way more fun (read: dangerous) in the Philippines where there are renting one costs $5 and there are no laws, driver licenses, or helmets. We turned a few heads as the area is mostly undiscovered but that may have been because of the one way street signs we missed.

The second day was entirely devoted to scuba diving. Balicasag Island was the drop point. I'm told by a trusted source the reef there is better than the Great Barrier Reef. Dive one was devoted to zoology: turtles, mackrel, groupers, and barracuda. For the most part barracuda don't bother me, even with their tendency to follow divers. But an entire school some 100-150 individuals strong (small by Balicasag standards) is a different matter. The school formed a wall 20 feet tall, 30 feet long and about 10 feet away. Because we were between the school and the rock wall, I couldn't back up to see the entire school at once. One albino barracuda kept our attention while the rest of the school closed in from above. With heart rate and air consumption skyrocketing, I gave a signal to move on. The second dive was more peaceful as we toured the coral garden which I can say is unmatched in all my experience.

The last day of the trip we went exploring deeper into the island, this time with a car (we got tired of the rain, wind, and onlookers that a scooter ride typically includes). We visited a blacksmith hand-making kitchen knives from rusty Jeepney springs and a newly replaced and upgraded bamboo bridge (now with 1% more steel support!)

From there we ventured into the interior to see the Chocolate Hills and the Tarsiers. The chocolate hills were amazing yet the pictures can't quite describe them.

Just imagine that with a full 360 degree panorama, hundreds in number, dappled sunlight, and alien in their near-perfect shapes. The Tarsiers of the region are the worlds smallest monkey are are nigh impossible to find. Thankfully they are nocturnal so they don't move about too much, allowing from decent photography. All this one is missing is a light saber.

Next weekend is devoted to whale shark chasing! Wish me luck!

First real vacation

Wow! It's been a month since the last update... sorry about that folks. Too much work and not enough play. To remedy the situation I'm flying to Bohol this morning for some dives, hikes, etc.

In the mean time, I'm proud to present "Confusing Conversations with a Salesman Part II"

Saleswoman: Sir, Fresh Pearls!
Me: (just looking)
Saleswoman: Highest quality. For you, first buyer, 1000 Pesos.
Me: How many first buyers have you had today?It's almost three.
Saleswoman: You're the first! For your wife? (gestures to my co-worker)
Me: Her? (Looking at co-worker) If I bought pearls for her, my wife would be very upset.

Happy Festivus!

If the letter was your first introduction to this blog: Welcome! (But don't get your hopes up; spelling mistakes and obscure internet references abound making this blog the third least legible page on the net.)
If you've been here before seeing the letter: I apologize for the atrocities to literature you've witnessed in the name of friendship.

The first reports of people receiving my Festivus letter are trickling in. So I figure it must be way past time to have a post in which to comment and vote on my Web 2.0 approach to apartment improvements.

This current stint in the Philippines has sorely lacked in the blog update department. Sorry about that! I've been working way too much and haven't had time to plan any trips. I'm going slightly stir crazy so I'm planning some epic weekend trips. I've got 3 weekends left and each has an alloted excursion. Hopefully I'll have some pictures or stories to upload next week. Until then, Happy (Belated) Festivus!

Massive Update?

This site has become sadly unkempt. For that I apologize.
There really is no way to rectify that so let's just pretend that since the last post:

• I went go carting, racing against my driver who let me win
• Flew back to the states
• Flew to Hawai'i (the Big Island) and went scuba diving etc.
• Flew home then flew back to the Philippines
• During the home stays I saw many friends and had many a good meal
• And most importantly, that I kept you up to date with frequent or even twice daily updates to this site.

That was fun wasn't it? Fantasy living is so much more convenient.

So now I'm back in the Philippines for what I'm told will be the shortest and final trip. (Talk about fantasies!) Before I get into the details of this current trip let me tell you a story:

My flight on Sunday night was scheduled by the companies new travel agent. It was last minute so I called them up 3 days before and asked for a flight leaving SFO on the 12th. She tells me that flight is booked and asks if I want to leave earlier. That is certainly my last consideration, so instead I ask for a flight on Sunday the 13th. She confirms the date and price, I have my boss authorize it, she books the flight and sends me an e-ticket which I print and throw in my bag. I enjoy my long weekend then hit the airport with just enough time to check in, clear security, walk to the gate, and board. (Sadly I have the timing down that well)
It would have all gone smoothly except the lady behind the check in counter tells me she can't find my name on the flight registry. So I show her my e-ticket and read along with her. We realize at about the same time that the e-ticket reads Saturday the 12th in big black letters. Obviously my travel agent decided to do me a favor by squeezing me into the flight I wanted but just forgot to tell me. So there I am, fully confident that I can show up for an international flight some 75 minutes before the departure time, grab my seat just as we taxi out and just cruise over to the Philippines.
She looked at me and thought:

"What an idiot! How can you show up 22.75 hours late to your flight and not know! I hope he doesn't flip out and yell and scream demanding a new flight and a first class upgrade etc"

What runs through my head is:

"Oh crap, I just had the company pay $2400 for a flight I missed, will show up to work in Manila several days late if at all, had my driver circle the Manila airport for hours looking for me, and gave my car and house keys over to someone whose cell number I don't have."

So I was in deep shit. So I laughed, she smiled, and I asked if there was any room on the flight leaving within the hour. At 30000 feet somewhere over the Pacific I realized that life is so much easier when "stress" is measured in MPa (material science) not in blood pressure.

< / zen rant >

Back in the Philippines for 2-3 weeks

Well I'm back. And to honor this momentous occasion, the good people of Manila threw a coup. More specifically, one person decided to throw a coup. Hilariously enough, that same person was on his way to a trial for an attempted coup two years ago. He escaped from the courthouse and re-kindled the spark of his revolution. If that's not enough, he decided to make his stand in a hotel literally across the street from the location of his last coup.
Before everyone starts to worry, it was business as usual the next day in Manila; it takes more than a coup to faze this country. In fact it was business as usual the day of: they didn't even close the street down... taxis and jeepneys were driving past the negotiators and tanks without a care. The only effect I've seen was that the FAA was out en force at SFO manually inspecting every third bag.

The staff house is full so I got moved into a "hotel" which is in fact a fully furnished apartment with bellhops and room service. Sometimes I wonder why I sacrifice so much for so little.
The shadow boxes are nice but I get the feeling the wall needs about 5 more.

Christmas here is still a foreign concept. The only thing that would make the next picture less bizarre would be a foot of snow blanketing everything.

Last minute ramble

(I'm not even going to try to make this post make any sense.)

I'm flying out tonight. And I would like to apologize anyone who I didn't get to see. Sorry!

While here I've added a third item to the "While I'm in the states to-do list". It's a new big project that should be fun for me and anyone who wants to help. Speaking of help... does anyone have a sewing machine I can borrow for a weekend?

Anyone bored at work? Take a few minutes to peruse this amazing list of online movies. (Via Boingboing). There are some really good memories hidden away in those Mb.

Among other news: I present the most epic disk golf picture... ever!
Okay, fine. Maybe not the most epic... but at least it's by far the best that includes me. Thanks to Trudie for the nice snap. (For those that are interested, that's hole 4 on the Golden Gate Course. And I picked up a par after that beautiful drive.)

See you all on the flip side!